Absolutely Free Funny Bar Jokes and Humour
This site contains explicit sexual and other language about a wide range of issues. If you are easily offended and do not have a sense of humour, do not enter.
Click the links below to go to the joke types you are interested in.
INDEX
A skeleton walked into a bar and said: "I'll have a Budweiser and a mop, please."
A guy walked into a bar. The bartender said: "You've got a steering wheel down your pants.""Yeah, I know," said the guy. "It's driving me nuts!"
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-----A man walked into a bar with a piece of tarmac under his arm. He said: "I'll have a beer please, and one for the road."
A grasshopper walked into a bar. The bartender said: "Hey, we have a drink named after you." The grasshopper said: "You have a drink named Marlon?"
I
went to the Bar the other day, and I was in
there for only about 5 minutes. When I came out
there was a motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket.
So I went up to him and said, "Come on, buddy, how
about giving a guy a break?" He ignored me and
continued writing the ticket. So I called him a
pencil-necked Nazi. He glared at me and started
writing another ticket for worn tires! So I called
him a piece of horse s**t. He finished the second
ticket and put it on the windshield with the first.
Then he started writing a third ticket! This went on
for about 20 minutes... the more I abused him, the
more tickets he wrote. I didn't care. My car was
parked around the corner. I try to have a little fun
each day. It's important.
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